Back in the Bush Era I used to think the media was ignoring important news and using fluff pieces to sway the public imagination, like Britney Spears and the world's largest hamburgers. In fact there were so many giant hamburgers on TV I started taking note, I'd say they really hit a peak around the Abu Ghraib Prision scandal. Now we find ourselves in different times and I don't believe it was a media conspiracy anymore, it's just stupidness, the media thinks we are stupid and thus gives us stupid meaningless stories, are people are this stupid? It insults my intelligence daily and hopefully yours. Unfortunately there will always be giant hamburgers and some doe-eyed anchor glibly giving you the narrative, it's usually something that sounds great in the "coming up next" teaser but usually turns out to be something you already know or don't care about like drinking coffee will cure cancer, red wine is good for you until the next study says it's not, or dramatic footage of a cute animal trapped in mud or stuck on an icy lake, I call all of these stories giant hamburgers, vaguely interesting but entirely inconsequential. Well, my friends meet the new and improved giant hamburger, now with even more calories... The Royal Wedding of Prince William and Kate Middleton! Right now I believe they are in the news every second day, at least once a week, apparently the Americans can't get enough of this stuff? Speaking as an actual Royal Subject, because I am Canadian, and citizen of a Commonwealth country, WTF Americans!?!? Didn't y'all have a war against the British and base your National Anthem on it? I personally never understood the fascination myself. The Royal Family is mildly interesting at best, I enjoy them in a historical context, I like to see the Queen's Christmas Message and I like to see the crazy hats! Other than that the only place I get excited about seeing the Queen is in my wallet on $20 bills! Does anyone remember the aftermath of the Lady Di death? Wasn't the big lesson that the media literally chased them into a hard spot? Yeah, so knock it off! William and Kate probably want to live their lives in peace, are actually not that interesting and probably like it that way!
Did you hear that a GAP factory in India exploded into flames and killed 25 people on December 14? Neither did I, until I got so tired of the same three news stories this week and went looking online. Is it too much of a downer to report such things before Christmas? I think this little GAP story really ties into the narrative of what is wrong with the economy right now. Lets not blame the GAP entirely, almost all the clothes on your back are made in India where people make $25 a month in Corporate factories, hope everyone got everything they wanted this year though! I don't think it would help the economy in the US if every mall and every Wal-Mart in the country sold out of everything on their shelves, the manufacturing and jobs are all overseas, it helps the CEO's I suppose.
More importantly, did you hear a ski lift in Vermont broke, injuring tens of Americans? No GAP wear was harmed however! Did you also hear thousands of travelers were stranded in Europe before Christmas? I'm sure it's awful, and yes I am jealous as I have never had the opportunity to travel to Europe, but really, no one has died here, do I need to hear about this everyday for a week? To a Canadian, the weather causing delays in life is not news.
The biggest symbol of the "giant-hamburger news" this season was Jon Stewart's treatment of the Zadroga Bill. In case you were led astray by Royal Weddings, this was the bill introduced by Democrats to help the sick and dying so-called First Responders of the 9/11 attacks. Turns out the police and firemen who were trying to help as the World Trade Centres collapsed got a lot of exposure to cancerous and toxic dust and smoke. It also turned out that to Republicans trying to derail anything Obama and the Democrats are trying to do thought it wiser to block this bill until the end of time or at least until the super-rich got another tax break. So, Jon Stewart, who has been telling us about this story for months had some actual first responders on his show before the Christmas break, tell their stories, remind people that they are dying and their children will lose their fathers soon. It took a couple of days but this did start to generate outrage and even got some coverage on Cable News, MSNBC actually did cover this story for weeks no matter what Mike Huckabee says, and the Republicans did an about face and voted for the Bill, although some didn't, who the hell are they? I will find out and get back to you.
So, will the news media ever learn? We already went through this during the invasion of Iraq, Rumsfeld and Cheney said blah blah, never mind look at this footage of the biggest hamburger in the world! Enough already, I have seen giant food and I have seen Royal Weddings before, please give me news!
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